God’s Sleep Solutions Don’t Come in Jars
Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you, casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you. I Peter 5:6-7 Recent conversations floated in and out of my mind as I walked the vitamin aisle of my favorite store. “I haven’t been sleeping well. I woke up again at 3 o’clock. I’ve got so much on my mind; I just can’t sleep.” As I looked around, words of worry stood tangibly in front of me as multiple containers of natural sleep aids sat in rows on shelves and end-caps. Clearly, I was not alone. Sleep issues were plaguing many of us. So, why can’t we sleep? What is keeping us awake? If I were to guess, I would say the thing that keeps us awake at night is not a monster under the bed, but anxiety. We’re worried, stressed and overwhelmed, and we can’t turn it off. Maybe you are like me and melatonin gummies may help you sleep in the moment, but they do not produce a long lasting solution to the true problem: anxiety. My anxiety rises and my mind kicks into overdrive when I get stressed and start worrying about things. Feeling overwhelmed and emotionally weighed down by all my responsibilities create burdens that rob me of the ability to sleep. I’m tired and want more than a short-term solution to my stress. Thank goodness, I Peter 5:6-7 offers us more than a Band-Aid for sleep from a jar. How does it work? I see two steps to finding rest from our worries in these verses. First we submit ourselves to God. We have to humbling admit we need Him (vs. 6). Next, we have to we have to put our “working to solve it” aside and let Him do His work within us by casting our cares on Him (vs. 7). Picture a dandelion being blown off its stem by the wind. The pieces are carried off and blown away when the dandelion is exposed to a breeze. In other words, in order for the dandelion’s seeds to be blown away, it has to allow itself to be exposed to a gust of wind. In the same way, in order for us to “cast our burdens” we must first allow ourselves to be exposed to the wind of God like a dandelion outside. We must become vulnerable, or humble, before God and allow Him to blow, or carry our burdens away. The dandelion doesn’t pick the seeds off. It stands outside allowing the wind to do its work. In the same way, we need to set ourselves out in the open before God and allow Him do to his work within us instead of “picking at” the burdens that stress our minds. Next, once the dandelion is exposed to the wind, the wind carries the seeds away. Like the dandelion, our job is to set our burdens down before God. The dandelion doesn’t take its seeds off before being exposed to the wind. It stands in the open just as it is, full of seeds waiting to be freed. God says He will carry our burdens for us, but in order for Him to do that we have to stop carrying them ourselves. We have to repeatedly lay down our need to “do it all” and yield our burdens to God instead. For me that means, I need to stop stressing and start submitting. I need to continually turn my worries over to the Lord. I need to tell Him all of my anxieties. I need to stop maneuvering to solve my problems and start releasing the results to Him in order to truly rest. I need to look for His presence in the midst of my circumstances as if I am a dandelion feeling the wind. So, next time you reach for the melatonin, pray about the thing that is burdening you. Ask God to expose the deeper issue that is at work keeping you awake. Then, ask Him to carry that burden away like a dandelion seed exposed to a wind. Do it again and again as long as you need to until the “peace of God that surpasses all understanding” infiltrates your heart allowing you to stand as an empty stem free from what has been keeping you awake at night.
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“All things are lawful”, but not all things are helpful. “All things are lawful,” but not all things build up. Let no one seek his own good, but the good of his neighbor. I Corinthians 10:23-24 As we begin to transition from staying at home, social distancing and mask wearing to going out with friends, eating at restaurants and attending indoor events, we need to take a minute and think about what that looks and feels like: not just for us, but for our friends as well. This past year has brought many changes to life as we normally live it. For many of us staying close to home with less human interaction has been a sweet respite for our introverted souls. For others, being isolated from humans left our extroverted personalities revved up like quarter horses waiting for the starting gate to open. Besides these two personality traits, some of us struggle with anxiety, OCD, or even depression. I don’t know about you, but for me navigating the nuances of a new world is a little nerve-racking. I want to be with my friends. I want to go out to eat with them or to get coffee, but not all of my friends are ready for unrestricted life. Not everyone is vaccinated: not everyone can be nor wants to be. Not everyone is free of health concerns for themselves or family members. Not everyone is ready to embrace being indoors in the crowded pool of humanity. And all of us are a little rusty with our social skills. In I Corinthians 10:23-24, I see the perfect guidelines for navigating relationships where not everyone is on the same emotional, social, intellectual, or physical page. Twice Paul states that “All things are lawful.” In other words, post-COVID I am free to do the things as long as it is not against the law or state health guidelines. I can go out to eat in a restaurant, I can go without a mask in public (at least we can here in Florida), and being fully vaccinated I can hug my friends. Before we get too excited about the freedom we are given, Paul balances his “you are free to do anything” with a “but” statement. Simply put, just because I can, doesn’t mean I should. Let’s take a closer look. Each time Paul states that it is okay to do something, he follows it up with an only if statement. The only if statements provide us with the guidelines we need for navigating our interactions with the humans in our life. Luckily, there are only two: Is it helpful and does it build people up? It’s often easy to get tangled up in the “should I do something” when all I really need to do is ask myself: is what I am doing helpful to those around me and does it build them up? If I am asserting my right to do something at the expense of someone else’s well-being, I need to rethink my assertion. If my words and actions guilt my friends into moving at a re-entry speed faster than they are ready, I need to slow down. If time together leaves us feeling more burdened than before we got together, then I need to re-think how I interact with my friends. As we begin re-entering our world by reconnecting physically with our friends, let’s remember it’s not about us. Paul caps his “it is okay to, but” statements with these final words: “Let no one seek his own good, but the good of his neighbor.” I am learning the easiest way to do this is to ask. Before gathering with friends, ask them what they are comfortable doing. Then do what the least comfortable person is comfortable with at the time. It may mean getting coffee and sitting outside at a park instead of going inside the coffee shop. I don’t know about you, but I would rather have an intentional moment of awkwardness than unintentionally wound a friend because I was doing what was right for me and not for them. For in it the righteousness of God is revealed from faith for faith, as it is written, “The righteous shall live by faith.” Romans 1: 17 For what does scripture say? Abraham believed God, and it was counted to him as righteousness. Romans 4:3 I clean up pretty well (my person, not my house). My stinky post-running body is quickly transformed by a hot shower, fragrant soap, expensive shampoo, a little make-up and a nice dress. Voila! In under an hour, all the remnants of my hot stinky mess of a self are gone. I wish it just as easy to clean up the hot stinky mess of my heart. I went through a season of my life where my life was a fraud. From the outside I looked put together: Bible teacher, minister’s wife, stay-at-home mom, the apperance of a growing godly woman. On the inside I was a hot mess: hard hearted, judgmental, works driven, spiritually barren. I was living a life based on external righteousness. I had let my faith become works. I had traded my faith in God for working for Him. It’s easy to get caught up in the trappings of works based righteousness. We want to please God, so we begin to do the things we think will make Him happy. We join Bible studies, we serve in church, we volunteer in the community, we give up curse words, we avoid worldly things, and we begin to build a resume of righteousness. The problem is instead of allowing righteousness to emerge from the inside out, we fight to force it to emerge from the outside in. In Romans, the apostle Paul paints a different picture of righteousness. The word he uses for righteousness is better translated rightwiseness. The righteousness of Romans 1:16-17 and 4:3-5, is an inside-out phenomenon. It flows from the very essence of God’s character. Righteousness is an attribute of God which is linked to His nature, tied to His promises, and interwoven with His faithfulness and truthfulness. We can’t make ourselves righteous: not obedience, being good, abstaining from bad things, or church attendance. Righteousness is given to us by God. He imparts His righteousness to us through our faith. When we accept salvation by faith in Christ, we sign up to walk by that faith for the rest of our lives. Abraham’s faith was counted as righteousness because he continually walked in faith following God. Righteousness emerges in us when we surrender ourselves to God. My life gets stinky not because of what is outside of it, but because of what is inside of it. In the same way, my life may look good on the outside, but that doesn’t mean it’s righteous on the inside. You see, when my life is squeezed what is deep inside of me comes out. My circumstances don’t make me righteousness or unrighteous; my circumstances reveal the depth of God’s rightwiseness within me. God’s goal for me is not look good on the outside. God’s goal is for me to be conformed to the image of His Son, Jesus. Just like a shower can clean up my outsides, God has been scrubbing away at my self-righteousness. Layer by layer He has gently chipped away the harden varnish built up around my faith through my self-righteous works. He is softening my heart bringing me to the end of myself and making me dependent upon Him. In the process, I have begun exchanging striving for righteousness for resting in faith relying on Him to transform my faith into something authentic and true. One thing have I asked of the Lord, that will I see after; that I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life, to gaze upon the beauty of the Lord and to inquire in his temple. Psalm 27:4 If you could have one wish, what would it be? Cure cancer? Establish world peace? Have children? Get married? Be debt free? Eat ice cream every day and never gain weight? Maybe you are the practical type and would just ask for more wishes. We all have wishes: things we’d like to change about ourselves, our circumstances, or our world. King David had a lifelong wish as well. In Psalm 27:1-4, David outlines the ultimate desire of his heart. Since David was known to be a man after God’s own heart, it’s worth looking at his heart’s wish. Before we can look inside David’s heart, we have to look at where he has placed his heart. In Psalm 27:1-3, David establishes that his life is held secure in God’s hands. David has firmly placed his trust in God. He trusts God to lead, save, and protect him. David is so sure of God’s protection that he is not afraid. He does not worry about enemies or adversaries. Even when he is under siege, he is not afraid. When I feel overwhelmed, anxious and afraid, I need to stop and ask myself: “Where have I placed my heart? Have I placed it in my job? My friendships? My bank account? My health? My children?” I need to get truthful with myself and look to see where I have placed my heart. Fear is a clue for me that something is wrong with my heart. It can be a sign that I have stopped trusting God with the details of my life. David is confident he’s going to be okay no matter what because he has placed his life in God’s hands. To David’s heart, God’s protection is greater than any fear he will face. He doesn’t need to wish for protection or salvation from what he fears, because he knows he is safe. If I am going to follow David’s example, I need to do the same thing and entrust my heart to God’s hands. By placing the control of his life in God’s hands, David is free to pursue his heart’s desire. So, what is David’s wish? What does he ask for? What does he seek? Let’s look what is inside David’s heart and find his one wish. In Psalm 27:4, David articulates his wish. His one wish is to simply be with the Lord. David’s biggest desire in life is to hang out with God every day. He wants to sit with God, listen to Him, and talk to Him. He wants to know God and be known by Him. He wants an intimate relationship with God. David wants God to be his best friend. If I am honest with myself, spending time with God is not always my top priority. I often seek a clean sink or folded laundry before a moment with my Lord. I’ll choose to listen to an audiobook while on a run instead of engaging in a conversation with my God. I’ll text a friend before I kneel in prayer. In not seeking God’s presence first, I let fears and worries creep into my unguarded heart. I don’t know about you, but I struggle. Fear causes me to worry about all kinds of things and circumstances. Because my life is not firmly planted in the hands of my Lord, I am trying to control it instead of relinquishing it. The desire of my heart is not for a deeper relationship with God, but with being free from the hard circumstances surrounding me. Desiring to be free from my fears leads me to wish for the wrong things. But, what if I changed my wish? What if I stopped wishing to be free from my fears and wished instead that God would use my fears to draw me closer to Him? What if I took my worries and sat down with Him and shared them, as if He was my closest confidante? What if every day I spent more time with Him than without Him? What if I just took a moment each day and gazed around me and saw Him? What if I incorporated conversation with Him throughout the routine of my day? Maybe, just maybe, then like David I too can say with confidence: “the Lord is the stronghold of my life, of whom shall I be afraid...one thing have I asked of the Lord, that I will seek after; that I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life…” (Psalm 21:1-4). I don’t know about you, but I want to make my wishes count. Behold, I am doing a new thing; now it springs forth, do you not perceive it? I will make a way in the wilderness and rivers in the desert. Isaiah 43:19 I struggle with change. Change produces a churning of uneasiness in my stomach as if I am swaying on suspension bridge strung high across a vast expanse. As an introvert, change requires groundwork for me. My reactions to new things are directly correlated to the amount of preparation I am given. In other words I don’t do spontaneous well. Once I am grounded in my surroundings, like a well planted tree, I am not easily moved. Change, whether it is good or bad, expected or unexpected, throws me for a loop. The unknown of change is like a wilderness. Needless to say, the past ten months have brought rapid unnerving change into my life. Maybe you too have felt toppled by changes this past year. These new changing landscapes require navigation on a steep learning curve. In the same way, the Israelites were no strangers to change. When the book of Isaiah was written, they were crying out for freedom from the bondage of Babylon. They were far from home. Captive. They were desperate for change. They could not see a way out of their dark situation and they were losing hope. Their faith in God was slipping away. In the midst of this desperate emotional and physical landscape, the prophet Isaiah reminds Israel of God’s past faithful deliverance. The images presented in verses 17 and 18 would not have been lost on them. The story of the miraculous parting of the Red Sea and ultimate destruction of the mighty Egyptian army was embedded deep in their collective memory. God was calling the people to remember how He had rescued them before. In the same way, God calls us to remember His past faithfulness in our lives. But, the message doesn’t stop there. It continues with words of hope. No matter how well our minds know that God is faithful, our hearts need something to hold on to when we are in dark places. Verse 19 offers us hope, if we will stop and look for it. Through the prophet, God tells his people: remember my faithfulness, then pause for a moment. Stop and look. Look and See it. See it and perceive it. Perceive it and notice it. I am doing new things. I am making something new and wonderful out of what you are going through. If you will take a moment and look around you will see it. Things may look dry and bleak right now, but I, your God, am making a river in the desert. So often this past year has felt dry and bleak, but in the midst of this quarantine, isolate, shelter at home, keep your distance wilderness I have seen God. When I stop and look I can catch glimpses of the rivers He has been building: restored intimacy in relationships, prayer warriors raised up, priorities shifted, and a dependency on Him built. When we find ourselves lost in a wilderness of change or uncertainty, desperate for a way out, seeking direction, let’s remember how God delivered us in the past. Let’s look for what He is currently doing, tune into His presence, and trust Him to lead us from the past, through the wilderness safely home. He never leaves us. We just need to look. "You're Kimberly, right?" he asked. "Right." "My daughter, right?" He nodded in a half statement, half question. "Right." I smiled. He patted my knee and looked at me. "You know I was married before." "I know." A little chuckle rippling through my response, "to my mother." (My parents divorced and my dad remarried over 30 years ago.) We sat in silence side by side on the sofa like strangers on a park bench. I longed to find the question that would connect us back together again. I silently search my mind for one memory we could share. Talking to my dad is like a waltz these days as wisps of memory dance in and out of our conversations. Timing is everything. Mornings are better than evenings. In person is better than phone calls. Sharing his childhood memories are better than mine. A question answer cadence is repeated over and over-1-2-3, 1-2-3. God is teaching me many things through my dad's journey with dementia. My dad can no longer join me in the world in which I live. The present day is missing for him. He often struggles with knowing if it is morning or evening, or even if he is married or not. When I go visit him, I can't expect to have a conversation with him as I have had in the past. He doesn't really know who I am. To him, I have become "that nice young person who came to visit." To finish reading my post, join me at (in)courage.me today. Sign up here to receive free notes from (in)courage, delivered daily to your inbox! As each of you has received a gift, use it to serve one another, as good stewards of God’s varied grace. I Peter 4:10 Can I tell you a secret? I really don’t like to cook. When I see on Facebook or get a text that someone has started a meal train for a friend in need, I start to sweat. Simultaneously feelings of guilt and shame begin to bead-up on my forehead. In my world of church ministry, not cooking for others brings a form of judgment. I often feel less than because cooking meals for others simply isn't me. Now, don’t get me wrong. I love my friends and care deeply about them; I just don’t like to cook. I feed my family, I make great game-day appetizers and snack food, but I am not a meat and casserole, Pinterest meal-maker. It’s not my gift, nor my passion. I Peter 4:10-11 tells us that we have all received a gift. A gift grounded in God’s grace. A gift given to provide grace-filled service to others. A God glory glowing gift. Our gifts are unique. Our gifts are varied. Our gifts are precious. Our gifts are to be valued. When the meal-train text comes around, I can begin to feel “less than” because I don’t want to ride that train. But, God wants me to realize I wasn’t gifted to ride the meal train. I was gifted in a different way. I was meant to ride a different train. Need prayer? Ask me. I’m good at talking with God. Prayer doesn’t make me sweat; it makes my heart soar. Need encouragement? A strong hug? A good book recommendation? I’m your girl. My gifts use words to encourage hearts and souls, not meals. I may never make you a meal, but I might meet you for coffee or bring you Chick-Fil-A for dinner. I’ll sit with you, talk with you, weep with you, or maybe even make you laugh. These are my gifts. These are the physical manifestations of God’s grace I can offer you. In the same way, God has uniquely gifted you. He has placed within you passions, talents and desires that are uniquely yours. The gifts you have been given are meant to be used in service to Him. Your gifts matter. You matter. You can touch others in ways that I cannot. I am grateful for my friends who think about meals, but I am also grateful for my friends who send me random texts of encouragement. Each one is using her gift to serve her God to meet a need in my life. I’m learning to embrace my gifts. I’m learning to lean into God’s spirit to notice the moments He’s nudging me to use my gifts to offer grace to those around me. How about you? What gift do you need to embrace today? Ask God to show you how He wants to use your gifts today to offer grace to someone who needs it. It could mean making a casserole for the next meal train, but it might not. There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. Romans 8:1 I struggle. I struggle with not feeling good enough. I continually prop myself up against the wall of comparison and make a little mark. When I step back and look, I can see other marks higher than mine. My mind instantly begins comparing. Almost. Not quite. No matter how hard I try, I’m below the line I want to achieve. I grew up believing that if I was the good girl who did everything right I would be accepted and my life would be rewarded. I believed that if I didn’t create conflict and was easy to get along with I was doing things right. Man, just give me the rules and I will follow them. As a child, being submissive, quiet, and hard- working paid off for me. I made good grades in school. I didn’t cause conflict at home. I was faithful to church. I was the poster child of a good girl and in many ways my efforts were rewarded. The trouble was when things didn’t work out, someone was upset, or I made a mistake. Immediately, feelings of worthlessness would wash over me and I would feel guilty. My self-worth was based on my performance and at some point in time I would fall short. The apostle Paul struggled with meeting expectations as well. In Romans chapter 7 he shares his inner conflict of wanting to do what is right, but not being able to do it. No matter how hard he tried he could never measure up to the standard of perfection. He wrestled with how guilty he felt because he couldn’t get it right. His mind swirled with all the things he was doing wrong. He wanted nothing more than to be free. Constantly struggling to do everything right was exhausting. He was following the rules, but the rules just kept get harder to keep. He loved God, but his thoughts and actions didn’t always reflect it. So, what do we do when no matter how hard we try, isn’t good enough? What do we do when in our minds we love God, want to do what is right, but fall short in our daily lives? Paul gives us the answer in the first two verses of Romans chapter 8. “There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. For the law of the Spirit of life has set you free in Christ Jesus from the law of sin and death.” Bottom line, we have to stop trying. We have to stop trying to earn the approval of God. We have stop trying to be accepted by our good behavior. We have to stop thinking we can do it. Trying to live a life good enough is like trying to live under the Law. The Law only reminds us of what we are doing wrong. It sets a standard we can never achieve. The Law was never designed to save us. It was designed to reveal to us how we fall short of God’s standard. God didn’t create me to be a good girl. He created me knowing that I would need to be a redeemed girl. The truth is Jesus completely and permanently accepts me, no matter what. He unconditionally loves me. He took all my shortcomings, sins, and failures and made them His own. In exchange, He gave me His righteousness. A righteousness that God cannot reject no matter what. My redemption is complete. So, the next time my inner critic begins to chirp at me about not being good enough, I am going to stop, breath, and tell it to be quiet because there is no condemnation for those who are in Christ. I am enough because He is enough. And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works, not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another, and all the more as you see the Day drawing near. Hebrews 10:24-25 (ESV) As much as I hate to admit it, I have spent way too much time watching TV during this time of quarantine. A favorite in our household has been Survivor. Even though we watched most of the 40 seasons live, enough time has passed that I have forgotten many of the twists and turns of each season. It’s it like catching up with an old friend you haven’t seen in a while. Honestly, I’ve enjoyed revisiting these past seasons. In case you missed it, the premise of the reality TV show is that individuals compete for the prize of a million dollars and the title of “Sole Survivor.” The show is a mix of survival skills, physical competitions and having good social skills. In order to win, players must build relationships with other players. Being just smart or strong isn’t enough to win the game, you have to be able to get along with people. Hunger, sleep deprivation, and simply being around ten other people 24 hours a day, leads players to get pretty snarky with each other. Hanging out alone, or just being with the ones you like, becomes an easy way to navigate survivor life. But, the trouble with those tactics is they don’t build the community of support that is needed to win. Staying detached and building cliques, alienates too many fellow tribe members and ensures a player an early exodus. Needless to say, the show has quite a bit of human relationship drama on it. As I watch reruns of Survivor, God has been revealing some relationship deficits in my own life. Throughout my life there have been moments when I didn’t directly mean to, but my actions and attitudes, alienated me from others. I have said hurtful things in moments of anger, hunger, or fear. I have snapped at my husband or barked at my children my personal discomfort overriding my amiability. In order to feel emotional safe and secure, I have built alliances with a comfortable circle of friends. But, my safe circle can alienate those who don’t quite fit in with us. My own awkwardness in relationships has at times detached and blinded me to the needs of the people around me. Internal insecurities often paralyze me from reaching out to others. In my neediness, I have unintentionally alienated others. Hebrews 10:24-25 reminds us that alienation and isolation are not what God wants for us. He wants us to be connected. (I Corinthians 12:12). He wants us to be joined together (Colossians 2:2). But human connection doesn’t just happen. It takes intention on our part. It takes choosing to take action. Community cannot be created without interaction. Loneliness cannot dispel itself. Isolation only dissipates as a greater sense of belonging fills its lonely space. In the movie, Toy Story, when toy falls out of a window, the plastic orange monkeys quickly jump from their barrel linking together extending themselves to make a chain until the toy in need is rescued. Their willingness to leave the safety of their barrel connecting together arm in arm saves a lost toy. Likewise, in order for us to rescue each other from isolation, we have to become chains of connection. We have to build community by linking together like the toy monkeys. I need to reach ahead to the woman who has gone before me for wisdom or behind me to the woman who needs encouragement (Titus 2:3). By linking arms in shared experiences, we can begin to belong to each other. Maybe, you are the first person in the chain of connection. You are the one initiating the relationship because you saw the need and are reaching out. Maybe, you are in the middle of the chain bonding two women together. Maybe, you are at the end of the long chain of support dangling out into the unknown. Or, maybe you are the one desperately needing rescuing. I don’t know where you are in relationship to those around you, but I do know we need each other. We need to start building chains connecting women to each other instead of alienating them from each other. We need to be reaching out drawing others into our circle of connections. Connection can begin with simply speaking up and introducing ourselves to someone new. Maybe it’s engaging in conversations with someone who is different than we are. It might require vulnerability and asking for help. Connection requires time. Mindfulness is needed to reach out beyond our circle, to seek out the needs of others, and to link together to meet them. I don’t want to be voted off the island like in Survivor because I failed to build relationships with those around me. I want to be more like the orange plastic monkeys who leave their safe haven in order to lock arms together creating a chain of hope for someone who needs it. I want to become intentionally linked to those around me. “And though a man might prevail against one who is alone, two will withstand him—a threefold cord is not quickly broken.” Ecclesiastes 4:12 (ESV) Repay no one evil for evil, but give thought to do what is honorable in the sight of all. Romans 12:17 Sometimes doing the right thing is easy and sometimes it’s not. I wish I could say I always choose to do the right thing, but I don’t. I can wage a pretty good passive-aggressive war when I feel like I have been mistreated. I have been waging an internal battle with my heart for years. My heart has a problem with perceived personal injustices. It doesn’t handle them well nor forgets them easily My typical response when I perceive that I have been wronged is a two-pronged approach. First, I avoid the one who hurt me (either physically or emotionally), and second I start garnering allies. By nonchalantly dropping negative comments to those around me I draw others to my side of the conflict. Needless to say, conflict resolution is not my strong suit. I am better at conflict avoidance. Paul writes a lot in Romans 12 about how we are to handle those who hurt us and none of those responses are to withdraw and sabotage the relationship. Paul instructs us to love, to be kind, to give, and most of all to forgive. I don’t know about you, but I can’t do it. I run away, complain, and seethe with anger. I slam cabinets, give cold shoulders, and breathe deep sighs of disappointment. My desire to handle things correctly only goes so far before my hurt feelings take over. So, what is a girl to do when she can’t do it right? She owns up to it. She turns it over to the One who created her and knows her conflict avoidance tendencies. She uses the conflict to draw her into a deeper relationship with her Creator. She prays about it, continuously. She prays for the guardian of Psalms 141:3 to protect her mouth. She prays for insight and wisdom. She prays and takes steps to be kind. She prays for courage and shares her feelings even when she is afraid. She asks God to use her for His glory in the situation. She surrenders what she can’t do to the One who can. She allows the conflict to draw her into a continual conversation with her Creator. She invites Jesus into the problem and follows Him towards a solution one step at a time. God is changing me through the conflicts in my life. He is changing the way I pray. He is changing the way I react. He is changing my heart. I wish I could say it is easy, but it’s not. Surrender is never easy. Heart work is never easy. Change is hard work. But, I draw encouragement from the truth that God will help me every step of the way. |
AuthorBetween a husband, 2 sons, and teaching high school my sanity is found in running and Starbucks. I have a circle of running friends who inspire me to be authentic and real as I live a life of faith before them. Archives
February 2024
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